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| This story is definitely worth sharing. L O to the other L
So, right before Christmas break I was chilling in one of my favorite spots, Sempre Coffee, getting some work done. Over the past couple of months, I'd seemed to befriend the barista there. We'll just call her Mrs C. We hit it off from the jump. Mrs C. was cool. She'd shared, seemingly a lot of her life stories with me. Some that left me in disbelief. Others that left me rolling with laughter. This one left me rolling and in disbelief!
So, on this day, I'd gone through my usual routine of things.....set up the mac, gotten my coffee, and ordered my everything bagel w/ lots of cream cheese. As I'm getting ready to put on my headphones I suddenly hear...."You wanna buy a ham for $10?" "Huh", I replied as I looked up knowing whose voice this question was coming from. "I said, you wanna buy a ham for $10?" she replied. I looked at her a bit , ummm, confused. Why on earth was she asking me if I wanted to buy a ham? Why on earth was she asking me if I wanted to buy a ham in a coffee shop? Why on earth would I buy a ham in a coffee shop when Kroger was, literally, less than 20 yards from the coffee shop? Lemme (clearing my throat) back it up a bit. Gotta give you a little preface after the preface.
The "barista" grew up in the grunt of Atlanta. So, she's been through..well, some thangs. No, really! I'd heard stories from her that literally made my mouth drop. Like I said we grew up on totally different sides of the tracks. In fact those tracks, I was never allowed to cross.
Anyhow, so I look at her a bit confused and kinda in shock. I thought to myself, "She's not serious?!" Yelp she sure was. I wish you could've seen her face. You remember the look of grandma when she told you to do something 3 times and you acted like you didn't hear her. Well, it was that look. That "I'm not gonna tell you again" look. So, I asked her, still in disbelief, "You're serious. A ham?" She said, "Yes, a ham". "And where did you get this ham?" I replied. "Well my of my friends got the hook up?", she said. "One of your friends?" I sarcastically smurked. Now, if you're like me you know a hook up can mean two things. Either it's legal or ILLEGAL! Which in point, this hook up was ILLEGAL.
She went on to explain to me how the dude that was hooking her up with these hams, stole them from Honey Baked Ham. WHAT?!?!?! RED FLAG, RED FLAG, RED FLAG! Call the police Call the NAACP. Slap yourself in the face. Call Johnny Cochran. Huh? Those hams were worth around $50. She went on to explain to me that he was on the run from the police for stealing the hams. I was about to fall out of my seat. I was laughing so hard. She told me she'd bought 2 and wanted to see if others wanted to get in. Now, I'm thinking this really can't be real. Who in there right mind would steal a ham? A ham ya'll. A ham! Could you imagine having to go to jail for a durn ham. LOL! I could imagine a few other things worth fighting and going to jail for. A ham didn't happen to make the list. The sad part about it was the hams are worth around $50. Why on earth would he sell them for $10. Someone wasn't listening in marketing class! Ok, maybe he didn't take a marketing class. At least he should've listened to uncle Junebug.
So through all of my chuckles I hear her say that the "incident" made the news. Now, for any of you that know anything about Atlanta's news that's pretty big, but not really. Nothing but crime ever makes the news. You may get the occasional good citizen piece, but 3/4 of the news deals with nothing but crimes and murders. Even on the weather piece....just kidding.
Ya'll by this time I was literally crying laughing. I'd never heard of anything so funny in my life.
So, I told her no and thanks for thinking of me. I also asked her if she were nervous about purchasing stolen ham. She said naw and said she was gonna get more from 'em. LOL! Wow!
A true hamfelony!
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| Since June...huh? Wow, it's been a long time. I should'nt have left you without a dope beat to step to! I love myself!
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| dang xanga, i do still love you. i've become an addict to crackspace. gotta go. gotta get a fix! | | |
| Ok, so I'm totally thrilled about my do it yourself mentallity I've taken on. I've decided to try and fix a few things before paying someone else to do it CASE #1: Well, for the past 3 weeks my blinkers in my car haven't been working (maybe a month). They won't illuminate or click. Because my days have been soooo slammed with "stuff" I haven't had a lot of time to get it checked out. A few weeks ago, while getting it serviced they did look at it and tried everything "possible". They tried replacing the bulbs and looking at the fuses. All of which were ok. They (meaning 1 guy) did say the problem could stem from an electrical issue. Back it up....a few weeks prior to the blinkers going out, I got into a 4 car accident on I-75. Yah, scary. Not the place you want to get into an accident. Not counting my bumper to bumper accidents (little taps caused by me), this was my first actual cars flying off the highway into ditches accident. Thrilling. Thank the Lord it wasn't my fault. Anyhow, so the guy changing my oil decided to try and plant fear in me by saying, "You really should get that checked out because your car might catch on fire". Ok, maybe he was just speaking the truth. But, who wants to hear that. I mean that's the last thing I would think of. He told me the accident might've caused some wires to loosen or go bad. Hmmmm. It all seemed a bit wacked out to me. So, with great urgency, I decided to kick it in full gear and gitter done. Since I knew I needed to take my car to the dealership anyways to get it fixed from the accident, why not have them check that out too. So, I took it to the good ole Dodge dealership for a little fixer upper. I told them about the blinker issues and they said they would check in to it. Well, Tuesday (my car was at the dealership for 8 days---I had a rental) I pick up my car and lo and behold the blinkers still aren't working. Grrrrrrr...I'm still not too happy about this. Talk about an uneasy feeling. Not only is it an extreme hazard, but a very easy way to catch a ticket from the po po. So, at this point I decided to look into myself. I get on the internet and start searching out the issue. To my surprise there were so many helpful tools on how to fix the issue. I kept searching to see if there were any common answers to the problem before I decided to just begin troubleshooting with everything in the nation. So, one common solution talked about this "flasher box". Ok, I can do this (I'm thinking) it's easy and cheap. So, I call Pep Boys. I gave them all my information and they said they had the part there. Yaaayyy, I was thrilled. I then decided to call there service department to see how much they would charge to install it. The told me the part would cost $12 and labor was like $24.75. What? You're kidding me? Awww heck naw. So, I decide I'm gonna do this thing myself. So, I get there, get the part, go out to my car, find the little box (that looks like the picture I saw on the interenet) to switch it out and........IT DOESN'T FIT. The part in my car turned out to be a relay box (don't exactly know what that means). So, I took it back inside and they refunded my money (luckily it didn't fit because the minute you stick it in your $$$ is now non-refundable). The lady in the back told me they didn't have the relay I needed for my car. So, they sent me down to Advanced Auto Parts. I then (forgot to mention..I'm running late for my lessons. So this is literally the last option of the day for me) purchase the relay part and replace it with the old one. And......IT STILL DOESN'T WORK. What the? I almost started crying. Ok, maybe not. But still. Darn. So, I decide, I don't care what it takes I'm going to fix this darn thing. So, I get home that night and decide to keep troubleshooting. All my troubleshooting led me right back to the "flasher box". Surely this couldn't be. Surely they meant relay. Nope it was the flasher. The problem was, I was totally looking in the wrong place. The flasher box, so says the internet, is located way at the top of the panel above my steering wheel column. So, of course, I overlooked that minor detail earlier. I was like.....augh augh. I can't believe this. The site described it as this green box that is virtually impossible to reach. So, the next day I go out to my car, all bright and early, to see if I can find it. And.....I FOUND IT. YAY!! It was so hard getting that thing out. I scratched up my hand, had dirt all over my back. But, it was worth it. So, I get to Advanved Auto Parts and the guy helping me tells me the part looks like the relay box (which it does, except....IT'S BIGGER IN SIZE) So, I tell him, no (like I know about cars) it's not. It's the flasher. He looks at me like "shut up". So, he finds the flasher for me. I gladly paid the $15 for it. I go out to my car to install it. It was so hard getting that thing in. Because there's not a lot of light up there I had to literally get on my back with my feet on the ground to see what was going on. I finally get the part in (by now, I have more cuts and scrapes on my hand) and try the blinker and IT DOESN'T WORK. But wait, the car isn't on. Duh... So, I turn the car on and.........IT WORKS!!!!!!!! I was cheezing so darn hard. Yay! I did it! Perserverance paid off! I did it! I would've been so mad at myself for paying someone $25 to fix such an easy do it yourself thing. Hoooray! Case #2: I fixed my cd drive to my computer. Well, with the help of Compaq/HP customer service. It totally works now. Before, it would come on whenever it wanted to. I've been battling this problem since last July. GRRRRRRRRR!!!! What a pain! I also fixed the door/tray to the cd drive. It wouldn't shut. I found a way to rig it. Yay!!!!! Moral of the story is: Don't eat hotdogs and cereal together while laying on your back wating to watch Sesame Street while thinking about yesterdays Pop Tarts..... | | |
| 1. Is your default picture your natural hair color?
my default pic is of ice cream. you tell me 2. Where was your default pic taken?
at my home 3. What's your middle name?
reygel 4. Your current relationship status?
with whom? let's just say i'm not available. 5. Honestly, does your crush(es) like you back?
i don't have a crush 6. What is your current mood?
chilling, tired, resting like a sloth 7. What color shirt are you wearing?
charcoal grey and red 8. what makes you happy, honestly?
being right, blessing others (and watching their excitement), being with the people i care most about 9. Are you musically inclined?
i'm there 10. If you MUST be an animal for ONE day- what would you be?
a bird or gator 11. Ever had a near death experience?
yes, allergic reaction while in college 12. Something you do a lot?
play with my phone, check my emails and myspace, breathe 13. What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
heaven..by mary mary 14. Who did you copy and paste this survey from?
heather devine 15. Name someone with the same b-day as you?
my old teammate beth wade 16. When was the last time you cried?
i think last week or maybe 2 weeks ago 17. If you could have one super power what would it be? i would fly 18. What's the first thing you notice about the OPPOSITE sex??
mouth/teeth 19. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
a tall african red bush tea 20. Whats your biggest secret?
now why would i tell? it wouldn't be a secret anymore, now would it? 21. What's your favorite color?
blue
22. When was the last time you lied?
last week 23. do you watch kiddy tv shows or movies?
when i'm watching my little hommies
24. Do you have a best friend?
nope.
25. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be?
my gift of procrastination
26. what are you eating or drinking at the moment?
absolutely nothing 27. Do you speak any other language?
i dab in a little pig to the latin
28. What is your High and Your low?
highs: being with the "fam", God's surprises lows: definitely atlanta traffic, thinking about my debt (not that it's a lot), memories of back in the day when life seemed a tad bit easier (with my mom and granny) | | |
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Thought of the Day--
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Why do we say how are you out of habit?
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